Monday, July 22, 2013

GOOD, SMART, EPIC STATUS MESSAGES


  1. ____You can run from your problems. Unless your problem is a cheetah.
  2. ____Today I watched a bee land on my arm. I let it sting me while I just stared at it and said, "Is it in yet?" just to make it feel insecure.
  3. ____FYI. If your back starts to itch really bad and you are standing at the urinal, never, ever ask the guy standing next to you to scratch your back.
  4. ____ I pulled my wife's panties to the side.......then put the rest of her socks in the drawer.
  5. ____Finally learned to speak Chinese. Now I just need to say stuff that makes sense.
  6. ____If I was an electrician I'd probably be fired pretty quickly since I envision I'd wander around a lot saying "I got 99 problem but a switch ain't one"
  7. ____Ignorance is like sleep, your initial reaction is to be angry at the person who wakes you up.
  8. ____Shout out to old people for graduating high school without Google.
  9. ____I wonder if people in the 1800’s got in bed & obsessively checked their letters for hours.
  10. ____Cars should come with two horns: one that’s like “Hey guys!” & another that’s like “I will end you!”
  11. ____I'm really glad we don't have to hunt our own food anymore.... I don't even know where sandwiches live
  12. ____It's safe to like someone's status without reading it if it got at least 5 likes. It's just like laughing in real life for no reason just because everyone's laughing.
  13. ____I wish hangovers and orgasms could swap durations.
  14. ____If we can teach gorillas sign language, we can definitely teach them the dance to Thriller. GET ON IT SCIENCE!
  15. ____The hardest moment in life isn't when you're sad and tears come out of your eyes, but it's when you're sad and you're forced to smile.
  16. ____Dentist: Do you remember the last time you flossed? Me: It should say on your sheet right over there.
  17. ____Don't worry, kids. Being an adult is mostly just googling how to do stuff.
  18. ____If I was just learning English and you told me a sport called BOXING takes place in a SQUARE area called a RING, I'd probably give up.

41 comments:

  1. Be careful of your likes on Facebook coz it will become the contents of your news feed.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Everything is fine, am happy about your blog. Thanks admin for sharing the unique content, you have done a great job I appreciate your effort and I hope you will get more positive comments from the web users.

    Regards,
    Aamala

    SEO Training in Chennai

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow! i really amazing very interesting articles are given.It's very useful on compose messages and i like that kind of information.
    ios training in chennai

    ReplyDelete
  4. Such as very good information,
    Thank goodness someone is promoting quality content.these information was more effective content.
    Oracle SQL Training in Chennai

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thank you for taking the time to provide us with your valuable information. We strive to provide our candidates with excellent care and we take your comments to our mind


    Dot Net training in chennai

    ReplyDelete
  6. ya you will be given more interesting from this article,but im expecting more news.but it should be use full for everyone.
    Back to original

    ReplyDelete
  7. Thank you for taking the time to provide us with your valuable information. We strive to provide our candidates with excellent care and we take your comments to heart.As always, we appreciate your confidence and trust in us.

    Dataware Housing Training in Chennai

    ReplyDelete
  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Superb i really enjoyed very much with this article here. Really its a amazing article i had ever read. I hope it will help a lot for all. Thank you so much for this amazing posts and please keep update like this excellent article.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Superb i really enjoyed very much with this article here. Really its a amazing article i had ever read. I hope it will help a lot for all. Thank you so much for this amazing posts and please keep update like this excellent article.

    SEO Company in India|Digital Marketing Company in Chennai

    ReplyDelete
  11. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Your good knowledge and kindness in playing with all the pieces were very useful. I don’t know what I would have done if I had not encountered such a step like this.
    Best Devops Training in pune
    excel advanced excel training in bangalore

    ReplyDelete
  13. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete

  14. Hmm, it seems like your site ate my first comment (it was extremely long) so I guess I’ll just sum it up what I had written and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog. I as well as an aspiring blog writer, but I’m still new to the whole thing. Do you have any recommendations for newbie blog writers? I’d appreciate it.
    Advanced AWS Course Interview Questions And Answers, Top 250+AWS Jobs Interviews Questions and Answers 2018
    Advanced AWS Jobs Interview questions and answers |Best Top 110 AWS Interview Question and Answers – india
    Amazon web Services Certification Training in Bangalore | AWS Training in Bangalore BTM Layout

    ReplyDelete

  15. This is quite educational arrange. It has famous breeding about what I rarity to vouch. Colossal proverb.
    This trumpet is a famous tone to nab to troths. Congratulations on a career well achieved. This arrange is synchronous s informative impolites festivity to pity. I appreciated what you ok extremely here 


    Selenium training in bangalore
    Selenium training in Chennai
    Selenium training in Bangalore
    Selenium training in Pune
    Selenium Online training

    ReplyDelete
  16. Great blog posting informative & understandable

    Piping Design Engineering course is a job oriented diploma course. Sanjary academy provide best piping design course in Hyderabad, India with job assistance.
    best Piping Design Course
    piping design course with placement
    pipe stress analysis course in hyderabad
    piping engineering course in hyderabad
    piping stress analysis course
    best Piping Design institute
    best institute of Piping Design Course in India

    ReplyDelete
  17. Really i appreciate the effort you made to share the knowledge. The topic here i found was really effective...

    Softgen Infotech is the best SAP Training in Bangalore , providing SAP Courses with 100% placement support. Our Centre has Certified Trainers who are working Professionals with more than 10 Years of real time experience on SAP Projects.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Dil ki baat status - Welcome to all of you in this section of our beloved, whose name is Dil Ki Baat Status and Quotes in Hindi. This section of our is really very special as we have listed best and very romantic dil ki baat status and shayari collections for you. Hindi Shayari Mala is the platform where you will always get romantic love shayari. It is not good if the heart's feeling is buried in the heart, and it is not so easy to express the feeling of heart to another, so we bring all new dil ki baat status and romantic heart touching status for you.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Really very nice post shared by you thanks sir for this lovely post and information about Fun and Quotes. You can also visit this Rajputana Status and Quotes in Hindi for best Rajputo wali shayari and quotes.

    ReplyDelete
  20. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Are you a story lover or interested in reading best childhood stories? So today we have brought with you a collection of such excellent stories. Do you remember the story of the thirsty crow in childhood, who used to narrate this story to all of us in our childhood? If you have not yet read this wonderful story, then we have brought the Hindi Shayari Mala for you, this great The Thirsty Crow Story in Hindi once again for you. It is our guarantee that you will have a lot of fun reading this story and you will get a very beautiful and important lesson at the end of this story. This story of ours The Thirsty Crow Story exists for you in both Hindi and English, so you can read it very easily in the language in which you want to read it. And for more such funny stories, visit your own Hindi Shayari and philosophy of literature Hindi Shayari Mala.

    ReplyDelete
  22. This post is so interactive and informative.keep update more information...
    Android Training in Anna Nagar
    Android Training in Chennai

    ReplyDelete

Sponsored